Prolifically Raw

Tuesday, September 02, 2008

Real or a Dream?

Another summer blows out and while it seems impossible that fall closes in and my beloved children will return to school tomorrow, arms loaded with bags of supplies, here it is.

Josephine is now as long legged as a colt and Spencer is as wide in the chest as a man. What's happening to these beings that were toddling around yesterday?

I burst out in tears today, describing Jo to her new 1st grade teacher. I couldn't help it. I told the teacher, "you're just so lucky to have Jo in your class. She's such a light."

Spencer stood on the porch as I cut his hair this afternoon and we were eye to eye. I realized I could no longer pick him up without causing myself serious injury yet all I wanted was to hug him close the way I did one year ago. He stays just long enough for a quick squeeze and is on his manly way.

As they drift off to sleep, I sit in the cool westerly winds of the night and watch the sun paint the clouds another shade of sunset pink. They say it's all a dream, or an illusion, and I believe that to be true. Life, moving so swiftly now, is both excruciating and beautiful. It is a dream too impossible to comprehend, too vast to contain and too fleeting to grasp, I can only take another deep breath and watch as it passes in front of me, through me, with me and without a me, this great play of being.